Kategoriarkiv: #English

What’s your big job?

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I listened to Parker Palmer giving this commencement address to the graduating class at Naropa University, and several times I got goose bumps and shivers. For me, those have become telltale signs that there’s something important and/or very true being shared.


The six suggestions Parker provides on living a life worth exploring are simple. And powerful. So powerful I followed my urge to split this recommendation into six consecutive blog posts. You can read my thoughts on the first, second and third suggestion here.

BoldomaticPost_Take-on-big-jobs-worth-doingThe fourth suggestion is: Take on big jobs worth doing. Jobs like the spread of love, peace and justice. 

Dare to dream, go for the seemingly impossible. I know I have these past 3-4 years. But I don’t even want to go there right now. If you’re interested you’l be able to find out what my goal for 2020 is.

The important thing for me is that we avoid playing small. Belittling ourselves. Yeah sure, maybe I can’t make a huge shift to society…. but maybe I can! Right? I mean, how would you know? If you don’t go for it – how would you ever know what might have been?

And don’t get me wrong, playing big doesn’t mean setting a big goal to change society, starting revolution, inventing something extraordinarily magnificent and winning the Nobel Price for it. It can just as well be about becoming the best parent around or spreading love and warmth where ever you go or volunteering at a local shelter…. or anything really. As long as you really have the feeling it’s worth doing. That’s what to look for!

Playing big, for me, is therefore more about stretching myself, growing, expanding. You know, like a balloon. When you first try to inflate it, it’s hard. You have to blow hard on it to make anything happen. And then – all of a sudden, it starts to expand, and finally – you’re there, with a beautiful ballon in your hands. Now. If you deflate it, and then inflate it again – it’s much easier the second time around, isn’t it? And possibly you can get a few more breaths of air in it. Just don’t blow so hard it explodes.

You know where that boundary is within you. I am certain of it. Just make sure you listen for the proper voice though! It’s not the harsh voice telling you ”You’re pushing it too far”, ”Don’t even bother to try it, you’ll fail!”, ”Who are you thinking you could do something like that?”… that you should listen to. No. Listen for the silent knowing, the kind that fills your entire body. Wordlessly it let’s you know, what the right amount of air is to stretch the balloon just a tiny bit further. That’s what you should listen for when you go for the big jobs.

So. I’m curious to know. What’s your big job?

Podcast 27/52 – Mindset: being vs doing

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The One You Feed is a favorite podcast of mine, and even though this one with Carol Dweck isn’t of the best show’s I’ve listened to from this podcast, it is interesting. And since Carol Dweck’s thoughts on fixed vs growth mindset is the talk of the town at the moment, I figured maybe someone would benefit from listening to this interview with her.

BoldomaticPost_fixed-vs-growthI like the reasoning behind fixed and growth mindset, possibly because I can recognize my own journey from (mostly) one to (mostly) the other. Luckily my direction has been from fixed to growth. For me, that is a huge part of the reason why my inner dialogue has gone from harsh to gentle, now that I think of it.

 

What fixed vs growth mindset is? Well, in short, as I understand it, fixed mindset is based on the belief that I have a specific amount of talent and intelligence, that cannot grow and evolve. This means that there’s no real point to trying harder, because I’ve got a fixed amount to work with. Hence, perhaps I’d get stuck in ”I’m no good at maths” and would fail to see that I can get better at maths if I work at it. Fixed mindset is encouraged by praising the result, like ”Oh you are such a clever girl!”, ”You got a good grade on that test!” and such. Accompanying though of fixed mindset might be ”I suck at this, so there’s no point in trying, because I will never get better.”, ”I hate drawing because it never looks like I want it to.”.

Grown mindset on the other hand says that you can get better, at anything really, as long as you put some effort into it. The focus is more on the process than the result. Regardless of my starting point, if I apply myself to it, I will get better at it. In time, I might even achieve mastery, if I put in the hours. So accompanying thoughts might be ”I have no clue how to crack this code, but if I work at it, I could probably figure it out. Let’s get started!”. Growth mindset is encouraged by putting attention to the process, like ”I can see how you’ve really put in an effort here!”, ”I see how you used all those different colors of green to draw that tree. It really bring it to life.”.

Anyway. What I find most significant in this podcast is the way Carol Dweck stresses the risk of fixed vs mind growths becoming ”a thing”, especially in school circles. This I believe is definitely a risk, and I fear that’s where it will end up in Sweden. It’s easy to fall in the trap of ”methodizing” something like this. That would be very unfortunate. Because this is not a thing you do. It’s a way you are.

Now, I say mindset something I am, rather than something I do, but of course, I will act out of my being, so it’s not as easy as saying it’s only about being and not about doing. The feedback to others that I exemplify above is a form of doing. But the risk, that Carol Dweck and I share a concern about, if you try to Do this without Living it. The risk of trying to give kids/pupils a growth mindset, while being stuck in fixed for my own development…. I mean, you can see for yourself how weird that would be, right? I guarantee that kids – if you are teaching, or parenting etc – will pick up on the mixed signals you are sending out, and they will see right through you.

So the question for me, is how do I switch my internal beliefs about myself, from fixed, to growth? How to live a life more based on a growth mindset?

 

Afraid of otherness?

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I listened to Parker Palmer giving this commencement address to the graduating class at Naropa University, and several times I got goose bumps and shivers. For me, those have become telltale signs that there’s something important and/or very true being shared.


The six suggestions Parker provides on living a life worth exploring are simple. And powerful. So powerful I followed my urge to split this recommendation into six consecutive blog posts. You can read my thoughts on the first and second suggestion here.

BoldomaticPost_As-you-welcome-whatever-you-fThe third suggestion is: As you welcome whatever you find alien within yourself, extend that same welcome to whatever you find alien in the outer world.

There is no other, that is not also a part of you.

I’ll write that again: There is no other, that is not also a part of you.

So be hospitable, curious and meet the world with the same sense of adventurous journey of discovery that you hopefully have embarked upon within yourself. There is no need to be afraid of otherness. Or rather, you do not need to act upon the fear. You can see it, witness it, and let it pass through. Because you are meeting yourself, when you come across someone, something, which you do not recognize, that feels new and different and unknown to you. That is how to grow. That is how to benefit the world. And that is where my hope for the future lies. Just imagine what will be made possible when we no longer fear otherness. I can see it in my minds eye. Can you?

London – photo book creation

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We spent the last weekend on June in London, the Roth family.
london eyeI opted not to take my ”good camera” and make do with the various IPhones of the family. Turned out to be a good decision. I am now sitting here creating a photo book from the weekend trip, and there’s some great shots. I started on the photo book last night, in part due to the end of one of my challenges and the start of another. Go figure.

You see, yesterday was the end of my journey with #cleanse4expansion. Not for good. But the project as such is done for now. So there’s no longer any need for the ”Oops, I haven’t done my daily cleanse, I’d better zero my inboxes and blog about it”-moments which have been a part of my life at least this past month or so.

And at the same time, earlier this week I started a social media challenge where I promised only to check my social media feeds once daily. So the ”Spending all my evening sitting in the sofa with my laptop chatting away with friends on Facebook and Twitter”-moments are also a thing of the past.

Hence, last night I started to create this London-book, and tonight I’ve kept at it. Probably have another third to go before all the pic’s are in place, and this time I’m writing the captions as I create, so it will soon be ready!

taylor1040As the reason for going to London was the Taylor Swift concert in Hyde Park on the 27th of June,there’s a Swiftie at home who’ll be very pleased when it’s done! And it was a really good concert, I was impressed with the quality of her show!

This time I’m doing the photo book on a Swedish site called Öskefoto, downloaded their program, but am not totally happy with the functionality of it. And the new Blurb software that I used for the birthday book I created a few weeks ago also wasn’t as good as I would have liked it to be. I’ve been an online photo book creator basically from the beginning of the service being available, so I’ve seen a lot of various functionality. And unfortunately some of my favorite features seem to be disappearing right now. Bothersome. So now I’m stuck in that awkward place of being not altogether happy with the two sites I usually use for ordering photo books while at the same time not really knowing where to go next.So what’s your best option for photo book creation?

Social media-challenge for the summer

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Woke up this morning. Checked my emails and the feeds of my favorite social media channels Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Did my Headspace meditation and then checked the feeds again. And again. And again.

twitter byegonePosted a tweet honoring my wise 15-year old who only checks her social media feeds daily, vowing to do the same. And then I deleted my Twitter app from my IPhone. It used to be situated right next to Skype in my Oh no no! Really?-folder, where there is just a void now.

As I was doing that, I figured, why not go all the way? So I closed the Facebook-tab in Safari (haven’t used the app for a long time on my phone) and reorganized the app’s on my phone to show my shifted focus.

Instagrammed about it, making a public promise to check social media only once daily during the summer. To be clear what I mean about this:
*Check Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Tinybeans at the most once daily.
*I’ll likely Instagram when a lovely photo opportunity comes a-knocking, but won’t check my feed more than once daily. And from Instagram I can post to Facebook and Twitter, which still doesn’t mean I check my feeds.
*I’ll use Buffer to schedule tweets, Facebook and LinkedIn-posts, pushing blog posts, because I’ll still be blogging on a (near) daily basis as well.
*Once my vacation starts for real (a few days to go), I’ll cut down on checking emails as well, likely not checking daily even, but definitely checking my work email at least weekly.
*I don’t include Messenger, iMessage and Viber in this challenge, so if you want to reach me, those are your best options.

There. Now I’m crystal clear what this challenge means for me. And since I posted my Instagram post, I believe a few people have already joined me in this challenge. So I’ll extend it to you as well – do you want to join us?

 

Book delivery

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I ordered some books last week and picked them up today. Oh, how I long to get started on them. Summer is saved.

As if my book case wasn’t already jam-packed with books I’m longing to read!

books

 

Here’s a quick rundown of these books:
* Synchronicity by Joseph Jaworski I read a month ago, and it made such an impact I just knew I had to buy it (I’d borrow it from a friend). So I’m gonna read it again. And likely, again, and again, and then again. You get the picture!
*The Tibetan Art of Positive Thinking by Christopher Hansard comes highly recommended from a friend, who’s opinion I hold in high regard. I can’t wait to read this one.
*Letters to a young poet by Rainer Maria Rilke is a book that I’ve heard Krista Tippett refer to in numerous episodes of On Being, my absolute favorite podcast, so I finally got around to ordering it too. I haven’t quite figured out what kind of a book this is, so it will be an adventure to dive into.
*My coach Carla have read poems to me, by both John O’Donahue and David Whyte and they have touched my soul. So now I have two books of my own, to dive into. The invisible embrace of Beauty and The house of belonging, respectively. I’m not a very skilled reader of poetry, but I’m practicing, and enjoying myself!
*And finally The Parents Tao Te Ching by William Martin. Pages from this book have floated around Facebook, intriguing me a bit. So I figured – why not give it a go, maybe I will find something there?

If these are the only books I plan on reading this summer? No. Not by a long shot. But it’s a good start, don’t you think? Have you read any of these? If so – what feeling were you left with after reading them? Based on this selection, do you have any other book recommendations for me?

 

 

 

 

 

Podcast 27/52 – Philosophize this!

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How can you not want to listen to an episode of Philozophize this!, when this is the prompt for the podcast:

philosophize this

I have listened to the first two episodes and definitely recommend you give it a try. I have followed the advice and started with episode one. Have listened to episode two as well, which was very funny in parts, providing me with opportunities to learn new things, which is something I love doing! And as the pod is now on episode number 63 (featuring Kant), I am geared for a summer of learning, inching my way towards current day philosophers, one episode at a time.

BoldomaticPost_Its-scary-to-live-in-a-world-w

And again, as I listen to Stephen West I am reminded that I am a philosopher. As I think, and trust, you are as well. Philosophy means love and wisdom. A philosopher therefore is anyone with a love of wisdom, you see, so how can one not then be a philosopher?

 

The event horizon

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I listened to Parker Palmer giving this commencement address to the graduating class at Naropa University, and several times I got goose bumps and shivers. For me, those have become telltale signs that there’s something important and/or very true being shared.

BoldomaticPost_As-you-integrate-ignorance-anThe six suggestions Parker provides on living a life worth exploring are simple. And powerful. So powerful I followed my urge to split this recommendation into six consecutive blog posts. You can read my thoughts on the first suggestion here.

The second suggestion is: As you integrate ignorance and failure into your knowledge and success, do the same with all the alien parts of yourself.

What I hear him say is that each of us is a complex individual, with lightness and darkness within. A friend of mine talks to me about black holes, something I know very little about. As I understand it, the boundary between so called normal universe and a black hole is called the event horizon.

That is just about the most poetic description of an edge that I have ever heard. When I heard Parker Palmer speak of the alien parts of me, I saw the event horizon before my eyes. It’s within me. Light. Shadow. Both exist, and are invaluable to me. And we can only ever know ourselves, if we acknowledge and cherish all parts of ourselves. It’s along the edges where magic happens, where light and shadow meet.

So when we utilize our full self, with light and shadow both, there is no end to what we can accomplish. That’s how the impossible becomes possible. And when we dare to see both our light and our shadow, our power is increased. Have you claimed and named your shadow?

Speaking vs Listening

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I have a right to speak up, to voice my opinions. And that is a right I hold dearly.

But sometimes, I wonder if we’ve collectively forgotten about the other side of this coin? If and when I speak up, I would like to be listened to. If everyone is so busy speaking, who’s doing the listening? Hence, perhaps it’s time to start to talk about the right, or maybe even the duty, to remain silent and listen as well?

Now, I don’t have to listen to everything, of course not. I’m not saying you need to either. You get to choose. It’s totally up to you! But at least once in a while, stop talking and practice the art of listening instead, and see what happens. You might learn something new, you might be strengthened in your current beliefs, your world might totally flip-flop due to what you hear. But if you don’t listen – you are missing out on many opportunities to grow, to expand your awareness, to get a new sliver of knowledge, and thereby getting another piece of the puzzle in place. The puzzle that is life, wisdom, the meaning of life. The kind of puzzle that has no edge-pieces. An eternal puzzle, where you can add piece after piece, for your entire life.

So don’t limit yourself by talking talking talking so much that you forget the art of listening. Because if you do, you place a limit on yourself. And I know, because I’ve been a lousy listener for parts of my life. So lousy in fact, that I didn’t want to hear any opposing views, because I thought that meant I was no good. If I wasn’t ”in the right” I had to be ”in the wrong” you see.

I totally missed the deeper truth, that by listening, and looking within, at my beliefs, norms and habits, questioning them once in a while, I enter the road to a better life. That’s how to grow as a person. Realizing a few years ago that other peoples opinions don’t have any bearing on whether or not I am good or bad, sure made it easier for me to start to take in what they said, made it easier to start to listen, to dare to look at what happened within me when listening.

I hope I never forget this. I hope I always continue to practice the art of listening, so that my eternal puzzle can grow and expand, in all sorts of forms and shapes and patterns, totally wild, and nothing at all lika a traditional 1000-piece puzzle of a house in the Alps. *Fairly certain the image in my minds eye of that house in the Alps is fairly similar to the image in your minds eye.*puzzle

If you go for the house in the Alps, go for it with all your might. No two puzzles are ever the same, and we should never strive for that either. I want (my!) life, my puzzle, to be something else. Unpredictable. Going for the unknown. Willing and wanting to expand and grow. While being totally at peace with the here and now. Loving myself in the here and now, but childishly curious as to what might come, what might be, what might happen in the here and now of tomorrow?

13,79 and 275 km later – #becauseIsaidIwould

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For a couple of years now I’ve set Runkeeper goals for myself, for walking, bicycling and swimming. This years I’ve switched from yearly to quarterly goals, to ensure I don’t end up like last year, having a huge backlog to deal with the last weeks of the year. Today was the last day for the goals of this quarter, and I got done with the bicycling goal a couple of weeks ago, so that’s not been an issue. The swimming hasn’t gone too well, I only went swimming once, so only 10% of that goal (1/10 km) got done. But I had a fair chance at the walking goal of 275 km, with a total of 13 km to go today to reach 100%.

runkeeper doneWhen I woke up to a beautiful blue sky and sunshine, I got my clothes and shoes on and headed out. Got almost 9 km done then, and after that I’ve been inside working all day. So it felt quite nice to get into my shoes again after dinner, to get the remaining 4+ km done. Which I did. Of course. I reached my goal #becauseIsaidIwould

Now, you might argue that I am a bit wobbly with keeping to my goals, since I totally bombed the swimming-goal of 10 km, while walking 13,79 km total today to reach the walking-goal. And yeah. You’re right. It is wobbly. #becauseIsaidIwould reach the swimming goal as well. Or at least I aimed to. But life hasn’t been such that swimming has been a large part of my days this past quarter. And that’s fine. I am not sticking to these goals solely to stick to the goals. I set them because I want to move, because I like to see the numbers stack up, percentage after percentage, and because I have some odd trait of really enjoying keeping records. Some records at least, the time tracking for work is no fun at all, actually…

So all in all, I am very happy with myself. I got two out of three goals done. Yeah me! When I reached the biking goal I decided not to start a new challenge for myself over the summer, and I feel the same about the walking. I’ll pick up on goal-setting again in the fall, I think. Or maybe not… who knows?