I love the concept of putting books in public spaces free for anyone to pick them up. I especially like it when you write a little something in it, passing your experience of it along. But I’ve seldom seen such a great example of it as this, shared by a friend of mine, it comes from her neighbor:
Kinda makes you want to go build one by yourself, doesn’t it?
At Tender Greens, Santa Monica, they had these pictures on the wall, with the most profound messages. I’m gonna share them with you because I think they are worthy of being shared, each and every one. This is the last one!
Slow down. Not a concept I was familiar with for the first, oh, say, 40 years of my life or so. But these last few years I am getting more and more in touch with the sensation of slowing down. Of contemplating, reflecting, breathing long and slow, not responding immediately, but allowing things and thoughts to settle down.
Do you need to slow down some?
Cecilia von Melen sent #skolvåren a link to a TED Talk by Julian Treasure, on five ways to listen better. Cecilia caught on to the idea Julian have that listening should be taught in schools.
It’s a challenge alright, to break the path of less and less listening that we seem to be on, but surely it’s a sound challenge to take on?
One of my Facebook-friends shared something beautiful on her wall the other day, and when I asked if I could quote her, the answer was an unequivocal yes:
You are loved, you are enough, you are safe. There is nothing required.
Happiness, joy, clarity, openness, peace… these are your birth right… they belong to you simply because you are… and they ARE you.
Sit down and ask any three year old.
-Shanti Zimmermann
What opens up within you, reading this about your birth rights?
At Tender Greens, Santa Monica, they had these pictures on the wall, with the most profound messages. I’m gonna share them with you because I think they are worthy of being shared, each and every one.
Grow young. Is that something you think about? I do. I look around me, at myself and my peers, at my parents, grand-parents (only one alive nowadays), but also at younger people, and kids.
When I think about growing young, I don’t envision plastic surgery and facial tucks and such things.
Young for me is a mental process, rather than a physical one.
Somehow being young isn’t about age. Staying young certainly isn’t.
Do you agree?
On the art of forgiving by the way, inspired by Hector Black.
I’ve not been best friends with forgivness for a while. Or perhaps best friends isn’t the word for it, but there is something about the way we use it, that rubs me the wrong way. I think we abuse it, telling kids to Say you’re sorry! for almost everything, and brushing it off afterwards, as if that’s that.
The Swedish author Ann Heberlein wrote a great book on forgiveness (in Swedish alas, the title being ”It’s not my fault, on the art of taking responsibility”, and it is thought provoking. She tells a story of a kid being bullied at school. When the bullies wanted to say they were sorry, the victim of the bullying refused to accept their apology, and all of a sudden the tables turned. Suddenly the bullies felt like they were the victims, as their victim refused to forgive them. The original victim of the bullying was more or less ostracized by both kids and adults at the school because she would not accept the apology.
That story gave me a lot to think about, I tell you. There is power in forgiveness, that way we use it, and somehow I feel we might be misusing it?
Who am I to tell someone to ”say you’re sorry”? And who am I to tell someone to accept that apology?
But I got some new insight into the concept of forgiveness during the first SuperCoach Academy weekend in Santa Monica, when Michael Neill said something like this:
To forgive means to make like it never happened. When you forgive, it means that you essentially go back in time to before what ever it is you forgive took place. If you are not willing to do that, there is no forgiveness.
That was a new take on forgiveness that I have not pondered before. It makes my thinking tumble along, doing a cart wheel or two on the way to more understanding and insight. Putting it into the Heberlein story on the bully and the bullied, I guess the victim of the bullying simply wasn’t willing to act like it never happened. And hence, forgiving her assailants wasn’t an option.
Have you ever thought of forgiveness in this way?
…and that made me realize dreaming is one of the best examples of how all feelings stem from thought.
I was dreaming something strange last night. I was in that no mans land between being awake and sleeping, so I remember the dream sequence very vividly.
I was with my son in a room, and all of a sudden danger sprung. We managed to sneak into a safe room, and I searched for ways to make our predicament known to people outside. I finally found two small buttons, one which started a flashing light somewhere, and one which set of an alarm. The second I pressed the alarm-button my son got terrified and screamed out of fear, certain a new danger was facing him. I looked over at him at the same time I pressed the button, and when I saw his reaction I immediately pressed the button again to stop the alarm, all the while shouting to him that ”It was just me, it was just me!” to be able to get thru to him.
Then I woke up. For sure, this time, no mans land long gone. Terrified. With a dreadful feeling in my entire system. Wanting never ever to get into such a situation with anyone, let alone my son. Angry at myself for not having told my son about the alarm about to go off, angry at having put the two of us in this dangerous situation. Angry at the world for frightening my son like this.
Tried to go to sleep again. But once I wake up from dreams like these, I have a hard time to go back to sleep, because the feeling, and thought, stays with me. And my mind keeps on reiterating the dream sequence, over and over again, somehow ensuring that the feeling will not leave me.
And here’s the deal: The feeling is real. Oh so very real. No doubt in my mind about that! But the thought, the dream, that caused the feeling to arise, was just a thought. It was just a dream. It hasn’t happened for real. It’s a figment of my imagination, created in the way thought is created.
When this happens to me I try telling myself it’s not real, that it was just a dream, but in a sense, that just makes me stay in the feeling longer, because I stay in the thought. And as long as it’s with me, the feeling is with me as well. Sometimes, I manage to ”reset the stage”, go back to the dream, and play it over, imagining a different outcome, a different scenario, in this case perhaps never stepping into that room in the first place. I didn’t go down that route last night, but luckily, I did go back to sleep after a little while, and the dream did not come back. But the memory of the dream and my feelings was very strong when I woke up though and I just knew I had to write about this.
My conclusion?
Well, that feelings are real, regardless if they stem from a thought pertaining to a situation in my physical surroundings, or to a thought coming from my psychical surroundings (fully from within my head, like the dream). But they they DO come from thought. All feelings come from thought. Sometimes I have a hard time fully getting that. But this example makes it very clear to me, at this very moment. And I’ll just let myself be with that for a little while. Do you know what I mean?
Listened to the most amazing story a couple of months ago, when playing an episode of The Moth Radio hour. It was an old man named Hector Black who told a gruesome, but hopeful, story of a murder, and the forgiveness that came out of it. If you have a chance – find that copy of The Moth Radiohour, and give it your undivided attention. This specific part of the show can be listened to directly from The Moth website as well: https://themoth.org/stories/forgiveness
The feeling I get from listening to this story will stay with me for a long time. I actually listened to it while driving to a customer, and I have to say this: The story Hector Black tell, pack such a punch, that I recommend you just sit down and listen to it, not trying to focus on anything other than listening. You most definitely should not be on any moving vehicle, if you are the driver of it!
The power of a story never cease to surprise me. And this one was powerful. Oh so powerful.
What story would you want to share with the world?
At Tender Greens, Santa Monica, they had these pictures on the wall, with the most profound messages. I’m gonna share them with you because I think they are worthy of being shared, each and every one.
The manner of which I keep my body influence me. If I walk happy, I am more likely to think happy thoughts, and to feel happy, since my feelings are a direct result of my thinking. I even go one step further, loving to dance walk. (Put on some music and go out walking, or rather, dancing!)
Have you ever tried it?
My business acquiantance dropped me off at Tallinn airport, driving through the gates for short-term parking. But, alas, it doesn’t have a boring name, like short-term-parking, but rather, the much more alluring KISS & FLY is stated on the gate.
I just found this so hilarious, so once I was dropped off, I just had to take a picture of the gate. Oh, and no, we didn’t kiss, I promise!
Is there any other place in the world with KISS & FLY-gates? Or is it unique to the cosiest airport in the world?
HERO - the coach 