Learning and unlearning

This is the most fascinating proof of how knowledge differs from understanding:

So amazing to witness the moment when he learns/unlearns, and how it seems to just click in place, somehow. Absolutely mind boggling how he actually had to unlearn something which he’s known for decades in order to learn the new way to ride a bike. It took him much longer than I thought it would, at that, and comparing that to the experience of his son…. Wow!

And yeah, I am deliberately vague, and hope you get curious enough to actually press play on the video above. This really is something worth spending a few minutes on! Ok?

From the deepest despair to the highest hope

Yesterday at the Innate Health conference a man by the name of Dicken Bettinger spoke. And how he spoke. Dicken shared a few stories, one of which related to a troubled teen, and that’s the one that got to me, real hard. A few minutes in on his sharing my eyes started to tear up and by the end I was sobbing, uncontrollably.  

From a place of opposing feelings; from the deepest despair, that we, ordinary people, can innocently be so cruel to each other, to the highest hope, that if you are listened to, by someone who has an understanding of the way the world actually works (inside out), your life can change in an instant.

Does that sound too easy? As if I look at turning from despair to hope with just a thought as something too lightheartedly?

I ensure you I don’t. But I think you just like I, have experienced at least once in your life, a change of heart, where you go from one state of mind to another, in the blink of an eye, in the time it takes to think one thought.

There’s a quote from Sydney Banks that describes this perfectly:

Everybody, everybody, is only one thought away from whatever you’re looking for, if you can find that one thought. And that one thought — do you know what it is? It’s a state of thoughtlessness, thoughtlessness from the little personal mind. This is why people meditate. The second your mind quietens down, what you call divine mind, spiritual mind, spiritual intelligence, spiritual knowledge, true knowledge — all the same thing in different names — comes into being. And you get what you call an insight, that is a sight from within, deep past your personal mind, and all of a sudden, your world changes. 

That’s where my hope lies. In the fact that a change of heart, a shifting of the way I see and experience the world, can happen in a heartbeat, born by the wisdom contained within one thought. That’s hopeful. And I rejoice at the fact that even though I realized the other day that I will not be coming to this type of conferences again (for now at least), I was there yesterday for an experience that shook me to the core. In the very best of ways, mind you, because I only stayed in despair for a short time. The hopefulness of it all takes over in me, and from there, beautiful things can happen. Because I know that anything is possible. That’s the message for me, after these three days at the Innate Health conference: look to and come from love and understanding. Then anything is possible. Anything. Even the seemingly impossible. Such as turning from a world of despair into a world of hope, all of a sudden. Hopeful isn’t it?

Love and understanding

Love and understanding. Yesterday I was reminded, again, that love and understanding is always the answer.   

Asking myself, I know that if I have done something wrong, something I am not proud of, perhaps even ashamed of having done, getting told off, made to stand in a corner to repent, perhaps even being ostracized, that never (!) creates a setting where I dare to truly look within and take ownership of my actions, and know or find a way forward from them, away from them, levelling up, rather than just repeating them over and over. Never.

What does create a setting where I am willing, able, to look within, honestly and consciously, and evolve, is, always, love and understanding. Unconditional. Non-judgmental.  That always does the trick. Given that I step into it myself. That’s the barrier for me. I also need to look at me with love and understanding.

Sometimes I don’t. And then I won’t. Evolve I mean, by looking honestly within. Taking full ownership of myself, my believes and my actions. If I’m stuck in a mode of self-loathing, judgment and disdain, there is no progression. I am stuck. Believing the inner chatter telling me how bad, worthless and pathetic I am, I don’t get away from it. I cannot rise above it, seeing it for what it is: thoughts. Transient, as thoughts are to their very nature. 

But when I step into love and understanding within myself, seeing whatever mindless mental chatter there is for what it is, transient thoughts, not Truth, anything can happen. That’s what I’ve experienced. Anything can happen from that place, the potential is unlimited, endless. Anything. 

And what a place that is to come from, to live from, where anything is possible. Where love and understanding forms the base, the come-from-place. Love and understanding for me. For you. For us. For everything. 

What happens for you when love and understanding is your come-from-place?

Constant comparisons

How much comparison do you do in a normal day? I know I do a lot of it. I think mostly out of habit. Perhaps also due to the natural tendency the brain has of putting things in boxes in order to know how to relate to it.

Anyway, I think a lot about this constant game (hunt?) for comparison that goes on in life all the time. This game causes me to strive to be better, more worthy, smarter, with bigger insights, better grades and so on. All in comparison with someone else, someone else who will then fall beneath me, in the race to the top of the game. I can get caught up in it just like the rest of us. But does it serve me?

Comparing

And really there is no reason to compare. I am already all I am – I’m like the sun behind the clouds, always there regardless if my splendor shines through in a specific moment or not – and why should I compare one sun to another?!

How does this habit of comparing influence the way we share bits and pieces of our lives? Today, with social media, sharing snapshots, comments, thoughts from my life is easier than ever. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, RunKeeper, to name but a few. There’s a multitude of ways, and I use a lot of them.

The trick for me is to take part in what my crowd share, and rejoice or empathize with them or cheer them on, all depending on the situation at hand. But to not fall into the trap of comparing and, honestly, degrading my own life and my experiences due to someone elses life ”seeming to be better, bigger, brighter”. It’s a life.

I mean we are used to the pattern in society saying when people share we shall compare… And that’s the pattern I want to challenge, so that you compare when it serves you, not out of habit.

Knowing this still doesn’t stop me from feeling low sometimes, when I fall short in the comparison game. But understanding that it’s a mind game I’m playing, also means that I know, deep down, that the sun is always there. In me. In you. And why should I compare one sun to another unless it really is of value to me?

Being human

So, understanding that I create the reality of my world, I cannot put the responsibility for my created reality on anyone but myself. However, and this is something I’ve struggled with, does that mean I can or should put up with anything around me? Like a stampeding herd of elephants in my workplace for instance?

Well. No.

The only thing it tells me is I can’t blame anyone else for what I feel. But if I have a preference for one thing (feelings are created via my thoughts, so it’s a part of the reality I create for myself), why shouldn’t I go for it, just because I know where the preference comes from?

I talked to someone wise about this, who didn’t really get why this makes such a mess of my understanding. He just said ”We’re human. Why make it harder than that?”.

imageAnd boy is that a great question, why make it harder than it has to be, eh? It made me let out a bit of tension on it, and perhaps I also stopped clinging on to the thought, but it’s still there in the back of my mind sometimes.

And this makes me think of The little book of contentment that Leo Baubata wrote. He’s very clear that noone else makes him happy. The feeling of being happy comes from within himself. But that doesn’t stop him from being with someone that he likes. Not because he or she is responsible for Leos feelings, but because Leo himself generate feelings of being happy when he’s with said person. And that makes him have a preference for some people.

Steve Chandler also talk about this, and he says something in the order of happiness being a feeling I bring TO a relationship, rather than a feeling I get FROM a relationship. (Happiness being but one example. Insert feeling of choice.) Ponder that one, why don’t you. I sure do.

Hm. Sometimes I think I make it harder to be human than I need to. But perhaps that’s part of being human?