I am attending the Innate Health conference in the northern outskirts of London at the moment and today is the last day out of three in total. And I had a realization yesterday right before the conference ended, having noticed something in myself both day one and day two: The standard conference format just doesn’t do it for me anymore. Sitting down from morning til late afternoon, just doing intake – listening to this interesting person, these riveting talks, this panel…. with short breaks and lunch, it’s too much for me. My head get’s filled up already by lunchtime. SImply because it’s all too good! And I’m to stingy to leave – I mean, I’ve paid my ticket, I want to get the most out of it…. That last part is of course something I could learn to drop, but still. I wrote in my note book yesterday that I should avoid conferences and go to retreats instead. 

I’ve never been on a retreat as such, but there are several that I’ve considered going to. In beautiful surroundings, with a few intake sessions/day, and plenty of space inbetween those sessions, to make sure there’s time to listen to what happens within during the retreat. It’s in the space between where the magic happens, rather than during a seminar, or a plenary panel, or a full day conference. 

My old self had no such issue with full day conferences. Possibly because I didn’t know that something else existed, or perhaps rather because I wasn’t aware of the magic of the space inbetween. I have learnt to reflect, to sit with myself and whatever wants to show up, these past few years, and these last days have given me the realization that I’ve changed. 

I like that. I love it actually. I love noticing the progression within myself, how what I do/feel/think today differs from yesterday, the year before or decades ago. It’s absolutely amazing, and I am so grateful for noticing it. It points to the limitless possibilities of life, of living on this earth, on having this human experience. As I write this I sit here with a silly grin on my face, feeling extremely happy. 

So. I’ve progressed. Full-day traditional conferences no longer do the trick for me, I have different preferences. Now I just need to remember this, the next time an opportunity pops up. And a few already have popped up I just realized. Hm. Time to act according to my understanding, and drop the ”Well just this one time”-attitude that is so easy to fall into when changes are to be made. What’s your best trick for following your wisdom rather than your old habits, in a situation like this?