I’m the fly on the wall

I just started the 10-pack series on Balance in my Headspace-app, and it started off with Andy talking about what balance is to him. I really enjoyed what he said, even though I don’t remember it verbatim. So I’ll just try to use my own words, because I want to share this.

Balance doesn’t mean level, even, a straight line without up’s and down’s. No, that’s not what balance is to me.

Balance, to me, means riding the roller coaster that is life, with all the up’s and down’s, speed changes, bumps and the occasional stop, without getting swept off my feet.

Balance means experiencing my high’s fully, without believing that it’s only when I am high that I can be happy and grateful.

Balance means experiencing my low’s fully, without believing that it’s impossible to be happy and grateful when I am low.

Balance means being ok with, and accepting, what is, in the moment, feeling it, experiencing it, being fully there.

Balance means laughing my head off, or crying my heart out, with the knowing that the strong emotion will pass, in time, however long or short. Being able to be 100% in the feeling, while at the same time being aware that it’s a passing feeling.

fly on wallThere is something very dual in it for me, because it’s both being inside myself, feeling and experiencing fully, while simultaneously being aware of what I am feeling and experiencing, as if I have also taken a step outside myself, being able to bear witness upon myself and my experience.

It’s as if I am being me, but also a fly on the wall looking at me. *haha* I promise I did not see that analogy coming, but now that it’s here, I like it. Because it explains my experience quite well. I’m me, but also the fly on the wall.

Have you ever felt like that?