Etikettarkiv: mindset

John Cleese and Groundhog Day

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Just finished reading John Cleese autobiography So, Anyway… which is a book I recommend even for those who, like me, haven’t really got the British comedy scene from the 60s onwards down pat. One of the foremost insights I had when reading was how apparent it is that life unfolds, in mysterious ways, and how going with the flow of life can lead to fantastic careers, such as John Cleese’s.

But besides that, he talks a lot about writing (he sees himself first and foremost, as a writer rather than an actor), and stipulates a few rules for writing funny stuff, the second of which I really enjoyed reading:

BoldomaticPost_Your-thoughts-follow-your-moo

This I’ve found to be true: My emotions are a guide to my current state of mind, or mood, to use John’s words. I react to the world, from my current internal mindset, rather than have the outside world create my mood. I find this important!

It’s a bit like Groundhog day, you know, the movie with Bill Murray, where he keeps on reliving February 2nd, over and over again. The same things occur, and depending on his current internal mood, he’s happy, sad, angry, annoyed, depressed, frustrated about it. The same things. But his mood determines whether or not he perceives it to be good or bad, happy or sad, cheery or boring. This is true also in my life, as well as your’s, and is not a movie-feature.

If I’m in a miserable state of mind, I will see all things through that lens. It’s not the miserable things of the world that causes me to feel miserable. My mood tints the world into appearing miserable.

If I’m in a happy-go-lucky state of mind, I will see all things through that lens. It’s not the happy things of the world that causes me to feel happy-go-lucky. My mood tints the world into appearing happy-go-lucky.

One day I knock over a glass of water on the kitchen table and you would not want to be around me, for all the shouting, swearing and cursing going on, ruining my entire day and giving me ample evidence the whole world is out to get me. Another day, I laugh at my own clumsiness and after wiping it up just goes about my business, without a single cuss-word crossing my lips.

Have you experienced that as well, where the same things happened twice in a row, but your reaction is totally different?

Podcast 27/52 – Mindset: being vs doing

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The One You Feed is a favorite podcast of mine, and even though this one with Carol Dweck isn’t of the best show’s I’ve listened to from this podcast, it is interesting. And since Carol Dweck’s thoughts on fixed vs growth mindset is the talk of the town at the moment, I figured maybe someone would benefit from listening to this interview with her.

BoldomaticPost_fixed-vs-growthI like the reasoning behind fixed and growth mindset, possibly because I can recognize my own journey from (mostly) one to (mostly) the other. Luckily my direction has been from fixed to growth. For me, that is a huge part of the reason why my inner dialogue has gone from harsh to gentle, now that I think of it.

 

What fixed vs growth mindset is? Well, in short, as I understand it, fixed mindset is based on the belief that I have a specific amount of talent and intelligence, that cannot grow and evolve. This means that there’s no real point to trying harder, because I’ve got a fixed amount to work with. Hence, perhaps I’d get stuck in ”I’m no good at maths” and would fail to see that I can get better at maths if I work at it. Fixed mindset is encouraged by praising the result, like ”Oh you are such a clever girl!”, ”You got a good grade on that test!” and such. Accompanying though of fixed mindset might be ”I suck at this, so there’s no point in trying, because I will never get better.”, ”I hate drawing because it never looks like I want it to.”.

Grown mindset on the other hand says that you can get better, at anything really, as long as you put some effort into it. The focus is more on the process than the result. Regardless of my starting point, if I apply myself to it, I will get better at it. In time, I might even achieve mastery, if I put in the hours. So accompanying thoughts might be ”I have no clue how to crack this code, but if I work at it, I could probably figure it out. Let’s get started!”. Growth mindset is encouraged by putting attention to the process, like ”I can see how you’ve really put in an effort here!”, ”I see how you used all those different colors of green to draw that tree. It really bring it to life.”.

Anyway. What I find most significant in this podcast is the way Carol Dweck stresses the risk of fixed vs mind growths becoming ”a thing”, especially in school circles. This I believe is definitely a risk, and I fear that’s where it will end up in Sweden. It’s easy to fall in the trap of ”methodizing” something like this. That would be very unfortunate. Because this is not a thing you do. It’s a way you are.

Now, I say mindset something I am, rather than something I do, but of course, I will act out of my being, so it’s not as easy as saying it’s only about being and not about doing. The feedback to others that I exemplify above is a form of doing. But the risk, that Carol Dweck and I share a concern about, if you try to Do this without Living it. The risk of trying to give kids/pupils a growth mindset, while being stuck in fixed for my own development…. I mean, you can see for yourself how weird that would be, right? I guarantee that kids – if you are teaching, or parenting etc – will pick up on the mixed signals you are sending out, and they will see right through you.

So the question for me, is how do I switch my internal beliefs about myself, from fixed, to growth? How to live a life more based on a growth mindset?