I’ve given a lot of mind to the concept of State of Mind these past days, since a lot of Supercoach Academy 2014 Creation weekend centered around that concept. And today I got to sample it first hand. My brother and I (thank you Mary, I would have written me instead of I there if it wasn’t for your help!) went walking around Ely this morning, taking in the lovely scenery along the Great Ouse river. Not a cloud in the sky, summer temperatures and just a very faint breeze. Marvellous!
We went to The Almonry for a light lunch, and there we were graced with the presence of four absolutely adorable ducklings. (Sorry about the poor state of the pic though!)
Had a great time, and when we got up to leave I noticed I’d lost the envelope with my British pound notes, that I put in my back pocket when we headed off for the walk. Gone. Probably around £100 in it. Nowhere in sight.
It didn’t affect my state of mind though and I sort of shook my sholders at my brother who cringed a bit when he heard it. He thought we should backtrack a bit, to see if we could find it, and we did. But no envelope. So we headed home again, to get my stuff and head on home.
And you know what? I really don’t care. And I mean it.
It was obviously a bad idea to keep it in my back pocket, so I won’t do that ever again. And for sure I could have used the money. I don’t normally throw money away.
But still – feeling bad about the loss, beating my self up for being daft enough to keep it in my back pocket where it – apparently – very easily could fall out, imagining all the cool stuff I could have done with it and filling my head with remorse for what will not be… none of that would bring the money back, would it? All it would do would be to keep me in a shitty state of mind.
And I’m not in a shitty state of mind. Am not inclined to push myself into one either. That will come when it comes. And you know what, next time something like this happens to me, my state of mind will greatly influence the way I relate to it. Had I been in a shitty state of mind when I made the discovery, I would have been filled with shame for what I had done, beating myself up over it. But I’m not! And it feels great.
Cause here’s the thing: the state of mind I am currently in, influences the way I perceive the world. If I’m low, the world seems like a shitty place. And that’s how I’ll respond to what happens to me. If I’m high, the world is on my side, and ain’t nothing gonna get me down.
”Oh, so just keep your self in a good state of mind then” you might think? That’s just it though: I can’t control my state of mind. I can’t decide to go from one state to another. It just happens. But knowing that it just happens, knowing that mechanism exist and how it works means I can observe my reactions, drop below them to realise what state of mind I’m in, and from there, perhaps make more sensible decisions. Like refraining from talking, texting, emailing or writing while I am in a really bad state of mind, for instance. Nothing good’s gonna come out of that, I promise. Not until my state of mind shifts.
And it will. Sooner or later. Knowing it’s a state of mind might just help a new thought come into my head, and in a second, my state of mind can shift. Have you ever experienced this instant shift?
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Helena–Your English is now 200% perfect instead of the previous 100%! I am about to have my usual humbling experience when I go to Europe and hear the multi-language talents of my colleagues from across the ”pond”! Seriously, thank you for sharing the counter-productivity of self-judgment–very important reminder…
❤ my friend!!